| Directed by | ||
|---|---|---|
 | Bob Kellett | |
| Starring | ||
|---|---|---|
| Frankie Howerd | Lurk | |
| Bill Fraser | Groping | |
| William Mervyn | Lord Twithampton | |
| Linda Gray | Lady Twithampton | |
| Jonathan Cecil | Nigel / Nigel Phipps Fortescue | |
| Madeline Smith | Fanny | |
| Nicholas Bennett | Mallett | |
| Mike Grady | Newsboy | |
| Dora Bryan | Cora Crumpington | |
| Stanley Holloway | The Great Vincento / Vincento | |
| Veronica Clifford | Velma | |
| Peter Greenwell | Pianist / Accordianiste / Leader Of The Orchestra | |
| Barrie Gosney | Stage Manager | |
| Bob Hoskins | Recruiting Sgt. | |
| Lance Percival | Von Gutz | |
| Peter Bull | Von Kobler / Kobler | |
| Vernon Dobtcheff | Muller | |
| Ingo Mogendorf | Captain Hamburger | |
| Gertan Klauber | Donner | |
| Stanley Lebor | Blitzen | |
| Percy Herbert | Cpl. Lovechild | |
| David Battley | Midgeley The Cook | |
| Andy Bradford | Despatch Rider | |
| Andrew McCulloch | Soldier | |
| Alan Rebbeck | Winking Soldier | |
| Hermione Baddeley | Monique | |
| Bozena | Frou Frou | |
| Ian Talbot | Soldier (Monique's) | |
| Parnell McGarry | Fat Nurse | |
| Leena Skoog | A Nurse | |
| Toni Palmer | 1st Buttercup Girl | |
| Delia Sainsbury | 2nd Buttercup Girl / Can Can Dancer | |
| Michael Brennan | M.P. | |
| Harvey Hall | M.P. | |
| Zsa Zsa Gabor | Mata Hari | |
| Patricia Quinn | Her Maid (Magda) | |
| Robert Coote | General Burke | |
| Kenneth Fortescue | His A.D.C. | |
| Mischa De La Motte | Diplomat | |
| Madhav Sharma | Indian Officer | |
| Robert Gillespie | French Officer | |
| Derek Griffiths | El Puncturo | |
| Lesley Anderson | Can Can Dancer | |
| Judy Gridley | Can Can Dancer | |
| Maggie Vincent | Can Can Dancer | |
| Wendy Lukins | Can Can Dancer | |
| Nicola Rowley | French Girl | |
| Philip Miller | The Waiter | |
| Liz Gold | Mademoiselle from Armentieres | |
| Jennifer Guy | Whore | |
| Victor Harrington | British Officer | |
| Sidney Kean | Singing Soldier | |
| Joe Wadham | Ambulance Driver | |
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